Hosting | Sketchjobs

It's 98 degrees an humid out...two women walk into the restaurant
"good evening, two for dinner, did you have a reservation?"
"No"
" ;That's fine, would you like to sit inside or outside?"
" Hmm I don;t know, is it hot outside?"

BLANK STARE

This happens ALL THE TIME, do they think we have a magical weather controlling machine out side?

Why would outside on our patio have different weather than outside on the street, which is 10 feet away???

Not only that but they were just outside! So they know that it is in fact hot outside.

People are dumb.

#396 — Comments (4) — 9/3/2010 at 1:36 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (6) — No one cares. (0)
"Hi, we have a party of 3 and would like to be seated....oh wait, actually there will be 4 of us...might be 5 later."

Know how many people are in your party when you come to a restaurant.

#377 — Comments (0) — 8/31/2010 at 12:47 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (2) — No one cares. (3)
Getting women with strollers to sit down is like pulling teeth. Every possible complication is considered. Sun. Wind. Cars. Locusts. Swarms of killer bees. I mean, every possible worst case scenario. Sit the fuck down lady. Babies are not as vulnerable to the elements as you may think. Park that $500 stroller, have your lunch, tip your server and go the fuck home. Nobody wants to oogle. Nobody wants to stare. You and your baby are not unique. You're one of 500 other people that would be glad to take the seat you're "iffy" about. Stop wasting my time.

#357 — Comments (3) — 8/25/2010 at 5:13 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (10) — No one cares. (2)
Why are you showing guests to their tables and then handing the menus to any nearby server? Just give the guests their fucking menus! How hard is your job, you lazy bitch?! Oh that's right, you have to get back to your phone call while gobbling down a pork sandwich. Just fucking disappear already. We all hate you anyway!

#244 — Comments (6) — 7/27/2010 at 2:52 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (2) — No one cares. (1)
When do all the men in Rittenhouse shave their chests? so far every 30something thats come into the restaurant has a body like one of those hairless cats.

#173 — Comments (8) — 7/7/2010 at 6:23 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (5) — No one cares. (2)
\"We\'d like to sit outside.\"

su re let me just pull a table from the dining room out into the parking lot for you

#135 — Comments (0) — 6/30/2010 at 10:43 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (4) — No one cares. (0)
"Are you still serving breakfast?"

Huh?

We've never served breakfast.
Its noon,
and we're a tapas restaurant.

#115 — Comments (2) — 6/28/2010 at 1:08 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (1) — No one cares. (2)
Why do all the hairless muscley retard fake miami wanna-be open shirt wearing idiots come to this restaurant? Yea, you got expensive shoes. I dont care! Your a piece of shit, and any woman that is with you might as well be a prostitute in my book. Go to the bar, spend $11 on a mojito then go the fuck back to jersey.

#13 — Comments (0) — 6/20/2010 at 1:21 AM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (5) — No one cares. (0)
my boss thinks he has all these great ideas. I just nod my head and collect the checks.

#1 — Comments (26) — 6/18/2010 at 3:19 PM — Hosting — Cheers to that! (2) — No one cares. (0)

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take this job and shove it.

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